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RESUME of:
GEORGE W. BUSH
1600 PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE
WASHINGTON, DC 20520

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:
Law Enforcement:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the
influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's
license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and
is not available.
Military:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused to take a
drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas
Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.
College:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. I was a cheerleader.

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for US Congress and lost. I began my career in the oil business in
Midland, Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil
in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land
using taxpayer money.
With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry (including
Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS:
I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making
Texas the most polluted state in the Union. During my tenure, Houston
replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America.
With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's
appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over
500,000 votes.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's
library, sealed and unavailable for public view. All records of SEC
investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed
in secrecy and unavailable for public view. All records or minutes from
meetings that I, or my Vice-president, attended regarding public energy
policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I am the first president in US history to enter office with a criminal
record.
I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one
billion dollars per week.
I spent the US surplus and effectively bankrupted the US Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in US history. I set
an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month
period.
I set the all-time record for the largest annual deficit in US history.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period. I set
the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the US stock
market. In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs
and that trend continues every month. I'm proud that the members of my
cabinet are the richest of any administration in US history. My "poorest
millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.
I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a US President.
I am the all-time US and world record-holder for receiving the most
corporate campaign donations. My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and
one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate
bankruptcy fraud in US History, Enron. My political party used Enron private
jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the US Supreme Court
during my election decision.
I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against investigation
or prosecution. More time and money was spent investigating the Monica
Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest
corporate rip-offs in history.
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in US history and refused to
intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in US history.
I changed the US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded
government contracts.
I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any president in
US history.
I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the
history of the United States Government.
I've broken more international treaties than any president in US history.
I am the first president in US history to have the United Nations remove the
US from the Human Rights Commission.
I withdrew the US from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspector's access to US "Prisoners of War" detainees and
thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
I am the first president in history to refuse United Nations election
inspectors (during the 2002 US election).
I set the record for fewest numbers of press conferences of any president
since the advent of television.
I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period.
After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst
security failure in US history.
I garnered the most sympathy for the US after the World Trade Center attacks
and less than a year later made the US the most hated country in the world,
the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.
I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously
protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for
protests against any person in the history of mankind.
I am the first president in US history to order an unprovoked, preemptive
attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against
the will of the United Nations, the majority of US citizens, and the world
community.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty
benefits for active duty troops and their families -- in wartime.
In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking
Iraq, and then blamed the lies on our British friends.
I am the first president in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%)
view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.
I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.
I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden [sic] to
justice.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING!!!

PLEASE SEND THIS TO EVERY VOTER YOU KNOW.